bilbo.

sort of stretched like...
butter scraped over too much bread.
i need a holiday.
a very long holiday.
and i don't expect i shall return.
in fact, i mean not to.

paris, je'TEM

i watched this movie a few years ago with some people that i didn't know or like

but moments "haunted" more ever since

i finally remembered to buy it (cheap) and each short really just kind of got me going.

until the final one, which hit me the hardest the first time, and definitely hit me the hardest this time. every second of it completely breaks my heart and gives me hope at the same time, and at this point in my life, with everything i've been trying to figure out, it was dead on. i had to take some serious moments after that. thanks.

i keep it to myself!

except in blogs?


So my dream, again:

Started off going to flight school
decided i wasn't ready since i've never even been on a plane before
so i asked if my family could drive me to American University?

I was beyond excited
I got there and did the cliche slow opening of the door with a look back and a smile
i was instantly at home, in love
so welcoming, so many options

went to the music room, went to the asian room (with all kinds of pulleys and other kinds of hanging type things)

i had to decide which area to study, but i knew that for once, i was on my own, doing something for myself

as i was leaving the walls of the school, i saw a label for "walt disney this way" with an arrow pointing up the walls

i woke up and was devastated that with the way things have gone, this can't possibly happen.

i should still try though...

do it to it

i'm gonna ask for this little push
and you're gonna do it
yes?


thanks!

caught in this strange

new music!

it's been nearly impossible for me to make up my mind lately.

maybe it's because i feel that time is completely lacking. fleeting? naw. non-existence.

shit never makes sense. hehe!

i want to leave. and bring everyone with me.
because really, everyone wants something different? but no one actually seems to try.

dreams when i'm asleep

oh, wo, wo, wo
keep.

theyre was SO much packed into SO little.
of course, the ever-elusive teeth falling out.

mickey running, minnie standing. in my garage.

the weird with the windows open.

piecrusts.


it haunted me allllll day! all day! for real!

i dunno. we'll see what happens. to say "i feel something is going to be good" is a recurring feeling. but who knows. shit's really going down (aka up) hah.hahah.

glasses

you just keep losing your sense of self by trying to look powerful. knowing you, you'll regret it just like everything else.

kbye.